Wedding vows inspo - Funeral celebrant Melbourne, Wedding celebrant Melbourne, modern celebrant Melbourne, modern funerals, modern weddings — Chris and Steven absolutely nailed their vows! Photo - Natalie Russell Photography

Agggghhhhhh Vows!

The bane of most couple’s ‘to do’ list but also subsequently; the highlight of most ceremonies.
Where to start?
What to write?
How does one convey their entire relationship into a few short paragraphs?

As overwhelming as the task may appear, let me be the first to say:

IT’S ALL WORTH IT!

The crowd love it, I love it, and most importantly of all; your partner will love it!

So where to start….?

If you’re the kind of person that likes to work within parameters, here’s my top tips:

Tell them that you love them and why
Acknowledge the challenges. (eg It was a rocky start but I’m so glad we stuck with it, etc.)
People prefer ‘real’ over ‘perfect’.
Make a few promises (or goals - promises can be high pressure so whatever works for you).
Some can be heartfelt, EG: ‘I will always have your back’.
Some can be funny, EG: ‘I’ll let you hold the remote control.. sometimes’ .
Let them know how your world is better because of them.
This can be anything from: ‘You help me be a better version of myself’ - to - ‘I’ve learnt to extend my culinary skills beyond toast because of you’.
Try to avoid words like never and always. We’re all human so let’s keep things realistic. Are you really able to promise to …

How long should they be?

I’d suggest nothing that goes over an A5 page works best, but there are always exceptions.

I get my couples to send me their vows so I can print and bring on the day.
Firstly, so I can check that they’re in sync with each other and
Secondly, so you have one less thing to remember.

It’s best to chat to your partner and agree to the plan.
Choosing the amount of sentences or paragraphs is a good start.

Surprise Vows - Pros & Cons

If I had a penchant for maths, (which I definitely don’t) I’d say that about 80% of my couples choose to keep their vows secret from each other.

Cons

They can have very different vibes and one party might feel let down.
(Note - this is easily avoided by sharing them with me first!)
You could misjudge the other’s limits or sense of humour etc
(Once again, I can help avoid this.)

Pros

Maximises emotional response and appreciation from the receiver.
Tends to get bigger laughs (if that is you want.)
Everyone loves a surprise… don’t they?

Ninja Vows - WTF are those?

Ohhhhhh baby, Ninja vows are THE BEST!!!!!

So basically, you write each other’s vows, don’t share them, send them to your celebrant and then read them out in front of everyone for the first time on the day.

I know, I know, that sounds a bit heavy…
But trust me, it’s nothing short of hilarious and everyone loves them, especially you two.

It takes the pressure out of saying everything with perfect precision, allows you to put in all the cheeky promises you WISH they’d make and turns the humour dial up to 11.

So if you and your partner feel like you’re up to the challenge, have a think about ninja vows.
You can still work out your basic length/feel etc, and put in plenty of heartfelt bits as well.

For a magnificent demonstration - watch the snippet below:

Craig and Norman’s Ninja Vows - Footage Form over Function Events

In Summery…

Don’t put them off to the last minute, or the final job on the list.
You’ll need some breathing space leading up to the big day, and until these bad boys are done, you won’t be able to relax.
Talk to your partner and agree on feel/length etc
Short, sharp and punchy is the key.
The longer they are, the longer you’ll be up there speaking them on the day.
For most folk, this is a scary thought.
Have Fun! You’re not writing an essay, or filling in a tax return.
You’re writing about the love of you life, you’re favourite person in the world.
What could be more fun than that?!